


Maid to Surprise

by serenlty



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Blow Jobs, Crossdressing, M/M, Maid Cafe, PWP, Semi-Public Sex, Threesome - M/M/M, happy birthday tho!, i wrote this because i was too broke to buy my friend a birthday present, i'm sorry mom, steins;gate is referenced too, when did i become such a sinner
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-19
Updated: 2016-06-19
Packaged: 2018-07-15 23:22:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,318
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7243018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/serenlty/pseuds/serenlty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In which Kaoru discovers that he's not as straight as he claims, Souma is pretty damn surprised, and Kanata is just glad that the two can 'get along'.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Maid to Surprise

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kaonata (hxmura)](https://archiveofourown.org/users/hxmura/gifts).



> happy birthday to my dear sinner friend ;) i hope this lives up to your expectations because i've written porn like once and threesomes are complicated  
> also i'm sorry mom

Kaoru’s halfway through a test when he realizes something.

Kanata never talks about girls.

To most people, it really wouldn’t be that big of a deal. Maybe he’s gay or something. In a school like this, it honestly wouldn’t be a shocker. But because it’s Kaoru, he’s almost completely focused on it. His brain goes to each time he’s brought the subject up around Kanata (every day), and tries to think of when Kanata’s shown even a mild interest in any girl (never). Come to think of it, does Kanata even know any girls? Kaoru doesn’t know much about his family, after an...odd response upon asking, he’s dropped that subject. But still, how could he not know any girls?

By the time he’s done trying to come up with a suitable answer, there’s five minutes until class is gone. The blonde curses something under his breath, glaring at the half finished test under his hands with malice. There’s no way he’s gonna finish it now, which means failing, which means another damn lecture from Akiomi-sensei, and probably the vampire too, about ‘responsibility’. Looking for questions that can be thoroughly bullshitted enough to try and avoid said lecture, he’s cut off short by the sharp buzz of a bell.

Kaoru manages to get to the fountain where he normally meets Kanata after school before Kanata, which is impressive-sometimes it seems like that boy can teleport...or something. Being an oddball and all, you’d never really know, would you? Kaoru returns to his previous musings, trying to think of any time Kanata’s mentioned girls. It’s a bit of a mystery as to why it’s affecting him so much-after all, it just means there’s more for Kaoru, right? Maybe, he thinks, I just feel bad for him. Yea. That’s it. 

Unfortunately for Kaoru, he’s so lost in thought that he doesn’t notice Kanata approaching-confirming that for the time being, the boy does not, in fact, have any teleportation powers. Instead of stepping into the fountain like he normally would, Kanata seems to notice the distant look in his friend’s eyes.

“Kaoru-kun~?” Kanata waves a hand slowly in front of Kaoru’s face, blinking his eyes mere centimeters away from the blonde’s. Slightly startled, Kaoru jumps and nearly falls into the water behind him. Kanata breaks into a small grin at that, watching as the other quickly tries to regain his composure. It’s a rather un-Kaoru thing for him to do.

“H-hey Kanata! You scared me there.” He gives a slightly awkward laugh at Kanata’s now expressionless face-which is a fairly normal thing.

“Were you thinking about something?” Kanata leans in green eyes bright and curious. It’s moments like this when Kaoru swears there’s something up with this kid. Then again...oddballs. And he’s probably the most normal of them, too. There’s still probably no good in trying to hide it-besides, why would you ever need to lie or hide something from Kanata, of all people.

“Kanata….” Ugh. he can’t figure out how to phrase the thought without it being extremely awkward. It’s likely that Kanata would probably just blink it off, but Kaoru would have to live with the thought of saying something entirely too embarrassing. “I think it’s time I showed you the wonder of girls, since my stories alone don’t seem to be having any effect on you.” Good enough.

“...How?” Kanata doesn’t object, which isn’t too out of character for him, probably. His shoulders raise a little in a small shrug, and Kaoru pauses. He didn’t really think of that...Kanata will certainly get lost in any sort of club, where it’s too dark to keep a good eye on him, and taking him to the beach will result in him getting too distracted by the ocean to meet anyone. This leaves one option.

“Apparently a maid cafe opened not too far from here, sometime last month. We should go check it out.” Completely forgetting the fact that, hey, Kanata has Ryuseitai practice and doesn’t exactly have a knack for ditching, like Kaoru does for Undead’s practices, the blonde grabs Kanata’s hand and pulls him towards the school gates.

 

It only takes about 15 minutes for the boys to walk there. The place itself is in a more urban area, a small sign announcing it’s presence. A small bell attached to the door rings when it swings open, alerting the others inside the building. The smell of what seems to be coffee and something almost obnoxiously sweet drifts through the air. The place is fairly crowded, although one particular girl seems to be getting a lot of attention.

Her hair is the same bright pink as Tori, and her eyes are a shade of red a bit more purple but still very much like that of the Sakumas. Two sharp objects stick out of the top of her head, and after a moment Kaoru realizes that they’re..cat ears? Not necessarily his thing, but the girl is pretty cute. Behind her, a slightly taller girl with a long blonde ponytail talks to a tall man wearing a lab coat, and a very frustrated looking girl who almost looks like she could be related to that one first year...Suou, right? Kaoru’s pretty sure he catches something about time travel and ‘gelified bananas’, and that’s when he diverts his attention from the scene. Someone needs to lay off the sci-fi.

Kaoru’s eyes fall on a rather pretty girl, her back turned to the entrance. Her long, dark purple hair sway in its ponytail as she leans over a table, a tray tucked under her arm. She has a nice figure too, with long, thin legs and pale skin. Kaoru taps Kanata on the arm, pointing to the girl.

“See that girl back there? That’s the type of beauty I keep telling you about. Smooth skin, elegant looking, long legs, pretty hair…” he sighs, and Kanata can practically see the hearts in his eyes.

“She’s...pretty…” Kanata has to admit, Kaoru isn’t necessarily wrong. However, something’s off with the girl...when Kanata looks at her, he gets a weird sense of deja vu that he certainly should not be having. A few moments later, the girl turns around, and Kanata knows exactly why. He also knows that things are probably going to get very ugly. As the girl begins to approach where Kanata and Kaoru are standing, the Kanata reaches for the blonde’s arm, gently trying to snap him back to reality. 

“Hello, and welcome, sir! How may I-” the girl’s voice cracks suddenly, and she stops dead in her tracks, a very familiar look of anger falling across her features.

“What the hell are you doing here!?” Her voice drops to be much lower and quieter, in some form of a snarl as she stands very close to Kaoru, who looks very much surprised and confused. It’s a bit hard to tell, but under layers of careful makeup and a very well-practiced fake voice, is.

“Souma!?” The girl(?) glares back up with angry eyes, and Kaoru takes a step back. Now this...this is unexpected. He quickly pushes out the thoughts of how pretty Souma had looked-because he’s a guy, and Kaoru is nothing but absolutely, positively, 100% straight. Right?

“I should be asking you that! I was just trying to show Kanata the wonder of girls!” Souma’s hand flies to his waist, where his sword normally would be, and the other two briefly wonder if he’s got it on, under the dress. No, that wouldn’t work, the skirt is definitely too short to hide a sword, let alone too many other things. Kaoru punches himself internally, because Souma’s ass did...does look really ncie in something like that and he should not be having these thoughts because he’s not into guys. 

“Why don’t you two step into a back room...you’ll disturb the others…” Kanata looks at his club members with a smile, and they both sigh.

“Fine, President. We’ll be back in five minutes.” Souma’s hand grabs Kaoru’s wrist harshly, pulling him towards the back room. He closes the door roughly, ignorant to the stares of everyone else in the establishment because boy, does this look a bit suspicious. Kaoru nearly trips over a chair as he’s dragged along, trying not to make eye contact with anyone and also trying very hard (and failing) to look at Souma.

“What the hell are you doing here! Who told you about me!?” Souma’s sure someone from the school has found out-he’s seen them here before, and he’s always been overly careful to avoid meeting the eyes of anyone he knows, or letting his voice drop around them, or accidentally saying their name, which has taken a ton of effort to manage. Sure, there’s an exciting little thrill to working a job like this, where anyone could find out...but if people actually did find out, well, Souma’s pretty sure he’d die of embarrassment.

Kaoru doesn’t respond, staring blankly at Souma with slightly glazed eyes and an overall weird expression on his face. Souma wants to yell at him, to tell him to speak up, he’s really acting like the disgrace that he is, but he’s cut off by-oh.

If Souma’s a bit confused, and Kaoru probably has a negative idea of what came over him. He’s straight, or so he claims, so why in hell did the blonde just slam Souma against a locker and kiss him? Souma’s immediate response is to push, to try to shove Kaoru away, but the blonde only responds by pressing further against him, one of his legs, subconsciously slipping in between Souma’s as best as it can with that dress in the way. Souma’s pretty sure he’s going to melt-he’d never tell anyone, but the third year currently pinning him to a locker is definitely not hard on the eyes, at least not in Souma’s opinion too.

The purple haired boy’s hands travel to Kaoru’s shoulders, pulling him closer, if that possible, and holding on for dear life as if his legs won’t support him anymore. His entire body feels too warm, each press of Kaoru’s lips on his quickly becoming too much for his frazzled mind to wrap itself around. Either he’s in heaven, in some kind of daze, or Kaoru might actually be as experience as he claims to be. Souma had always doubted it, but, well...proof is proof.

Souma lets his lips part slightly, and nearly chokes on the little air left in his mouth when a tongue that is definitely not his invades the space, pushing into his mouth with no restrain. His breath hitches slightly when the presence doesn’t go away, a small, and quite embarrassing whimper of sorts leaving the back of his throat as his hands clench tighter into Kaoru’s uniform jacket.

That’s when Kaoru pulls back, looks down at the very flustered Souma below him, and proceeds to slam his head into the locker above Souma’s slightly slumped form. The Akatsuki member jumps at the noise, and he almost laughs when he hears Kaoru incessantly chanting something about ‘I’m straight, I’m straight’ under his breath. Attractive as he may be, that boy cannot take a hint.

“I thought you were straight. And you hated me.” Kaoru pulls away from the locker enough to roll his eyes at Souma, although most of his body is still pressed against Souma, at least enough for Souma to realize that yes, that is someone’s dick poking him.

“Me..me too.” Kaoru laughs a little bit, just as flustered as Souma is. Souma, in response, almost jokingly asks him if he has some sort of crossdressing kink, but he hold back the snide remark because that might make Kaoru leave and he really, really doesn’t want that. Not yet.

“Well, you’re clearly not. So continue.” Souma can’t believe the words that leave his mouth, but the smirk that the other follows with shows him that he’s clearly going to get his wish. It hardly occurs to him that he said to Kanata they’d only take a couple minutes-which it’s already been. Then again, Kanata’s always had a bit of a weird sense of time, and reality in general it seems, so maybe they’ll be ok.

Kaoru lowers his head to Souma’s neck this time, and Souma can’t believe he’s submitting so easily like this. He’s a warrior, he shouldn’t be giving in, but something about the press of lips and teeth on his neck and the movement of Kaoru’s leg between his feel right, moreso than he wants to think about. Another involuntary moan, this time Kaoru’s name, slips out of mouth, and he feels a small smirk pressed against his neck, which is starting to ache. He’s really hopes Kaoru can’t tell how embarrassingly hard he is right now, which is probably obvious due to the fact that this damn job requires him to wear tights. 

Souma pushes Kaoru away for a moment, enough to take off the stupid heels he’s wearing that hurt his feet almost as much as hour-long live shows, and sighs in relief when they’re gone. Then, his hands go to remove the offending tights, but Kaoru’s hand settles on his, stopping them. 

“Let me.” Souma nods, gulping a little when Kaoru’s too-warm hands slowly pull the tights over his legs, careful not to tear the thin material. When they’re gone, Souma feels a bit uncomfortable because the material on the inside of the skirt is kind of scratchy and-hey, did Kaoru take his underwear too?! He looks down, confirms that the blonde did, and catches a wink from him. Throwing the clothes off to the side somewhere, Kaoru repositions himself, kneeling in between Souma’s legs.

Souma feels hot breath on his upper, too close to much to sensitive areas, and twitches a little, before letting out a yelp of pain when teeth sink into his leg. Did he pick that up from the vampire?! Nevertheless, it feels much better when Kaoru drags his tongue over it, one hand reaching up blindly to find the head of Souma’s cock and gently run his thumb over it. Souma’s head falls back against the locker he’s still standing against, moaning nonsensical syllables as Kaoru’s hand teases him carefully. Souma’s doubts about this boy ever being straight are quickly slipping away.

Kaoru’s hand works it way across his cock, touching almost too lightly, but enough to thrust his hips forward into the touch. An amused chuckle of, ‘I thought you hated me’ escapes his lips, and Souma growls, but the sound becomes a moan when Kaoru’s hand increases it’s pace. It’s uncomfortable how hot it is down there, between the breath and bites on his legs and the hand working him into a moaning fit.

The hand then pulls away, and Souma nearly hisses in anger, before a warm, slick finger presses against his ass moments later. He feels his breath catch again-he’s definitely done this to himself before, but it’s a lot scarier when it’s someone else doing it. Probably, it’s not like he knows. The warm finger circles him, lightly applying pressure on his skin before gently pressing into him, and Souma makes a noise that is equally pained and pleasured.

“Are you okay?” Kaoru’s flushed face poked out from the ridiculous skirt that Souma is still wearing, for whatever reason, shouldn’t he take this thing off? He nods, clenching around the finger.

“Yes...just nervous.” Kaoru’s head disappears again between the skirts, and when Souma relaxed the finger slides in a bit further. He carefully moves the finger back and forth, just slightly, but enough to make Souma gasp at the sensation. When moving one finger becomes easy, Kaoru carefully slips in a second finger. Rinse and repeat, and then a third.

It’s almost comical how much Souma twitches and rocks his hips against the fingers. Kaoru didn’t expect he’d give himself up this easily, although he can’t complain. He’s still a bit confused, because he’s pretty sure he’s straight, but then again he’s currently got three fingers up another guy’s ass so that statement holds little to no value.

Souma suddenly cries out, his hips shoving down onto Kaoru’s finger. Kaoru smirks to himself, not that Souma would be able to see it anyways, and continues to press into Souma until he’s a constant stream of moans and praises. As much as he’d like to sit here and having Souma writhing around his fingers, Kaoru’s come to the realization that he too, is achingly hard, and Souma’s probably good to go by now, right? He drags his slick fingers along the inside of Souma’s tight, standing up, only to be slammed into the wall behind him by Souma, who seems to want something.

Souma kneels down in front of Kaoru, determined. It’s not fair that Kaoru’s made such a mess of himself and Souma’s hardly touched him, not fair at all. His shaking fingers quickly undo Kaoru’s belt, throwing it somewhere to be found later, and his pale hands move the blonde’s clothing out of the way enough that Souma can find the other’s member. He looks at it for a moment, a little unsure of what to do, before running his thumb over the head like he remembers Kaoru doing. The blonde above him sucks in a breath, one hand coming down to grip Souma’s long, slightly sweaty hair.

Souma cautiously works his hand around the hard length, before taking a deep, calming breath, and placing his lips around the head. The noise that leaves Kaoru is nothing short of sinful, and Souma carefully looks up to see the blonde’s back arched sharply, his shoulders and head pressed into the wall with his free arm draped across his forehead, lips parted. The flushed look on his face is satisfying to Souma, as he looks back down to the task at hand, carefully taking a little bit more of the length into his mouth.

When his hand goes to cover the space that he will not force into his mouth, it’s a bit clumsy. However, it doesn’t keep Kaoru from crying out his name in a way that is definitely going to get them caught if he doesn’t quiet down. Souma can’t say he particularly cares otherwise-Kaoru’s always had a smooth voice, and it’s nice to hear it crack and break for once. Kaoru’s hips instinctively thrust forward into Souma’s warm mouth, and the purple haired boy feels himself choke for a moment before he backs off, coughing.

“Sorry…” Kaoru pushes a spare lock of hair out of his eyes, glancing down at Souma (who’s still coughing slightly) apologetically. Souma, who is still wearing the damn dress. Maybe Kaoru really does have some weird crossdressing kink.

“Not sorry.” Souma find himself pressed against the locker he was against before, although this time it’s his hands desperately pressing into the locker in front of him for balance while his exposed entrance is pressed against Kaoru. He whimpers, shuddering when Kaoru drags himself across Souma’s hole, the warmth getting unbearable.

“Are you sure you’re alright with this? Probably should have asked sooner.” Souma nods, surprised to hear the words coming from Kaoru.

“Yea. This is fine.” He can’t see Kaoru’s smirk, but he can feel it when Kaoru lines his dripping cock up with Souma. He’s slightly worried that the boy’s tightened or something, but it hasn’t been that, long, right?

“Just..I don’t know, tell me if I hurt you. Can’t have Kanata wanting to kill me for hurting you.” Souma laughs at that, because he highly doubts that Kanata would ever kill anyone, let alone hurt them, unless it was a complete accident.

“Got it.”

Kaoru carefully eases himself in a slight grunt passing his lips at the sudden tight warmth around him. Yea, so much for that whole ‘straight’ thing. When Souma doesn’t object, he carefully presses in a little further, moving slowly until Souma suddenly clenches down and whines, clearly pained.

And that’s when the door to the back room opens.

Kaoru jumps, there’s no way he can hide this, his dick is in Souma’s goddamn ass and he really prays that whoever it is is not going to see them-

“Kaoru-kun~ You guys are taking a long time…” Kaoru stares, his eyes meeting Kanata’s green gaze. Moments later, the boy’s face is unexplainably red, although he’s still approaching the two. Kaoru removes himself, frowning slightly at the chill that follows, and Souma straightens up, face as bright as the hair of that catgirl person out there.

Kanata laughs, a soft melodic sound that Kaoru never really noticed was so pretty and wow ok I’m turning really gay. He approaches Souma wordlessly, suddenly shoving the purple haired boy to his knees. Souma catches himself on his hands as well, and Kanata kneels in front of him. Kaoru looks down, confused, because this is not Kanata.

“We all head Kaoru moaning your name....” Kanata smiles a little, running a hand through Souma’s hair gently, pulling it out of its ponytail and letting the holder fall to the floor.

“I’m glad my club member have learned to get along…” Kaoru looks at Kanata like he’s crazy, because this isn’t exactly getting along, it’s everything but and so much more at the same time.

“Kaoru-kun, you two can continue~” Kanata almost says the words like an order, and maybe because tis the club president, Kaoru carefully gets down on his knees, and arranges himself like he was before, carefully pressing into Souma again. This time, the noise is less pained, and Kaoru feels himself reaching further in, more of himself being wrapped in the intense warmth, before he can’t go any further. Out of care for Souma, he stops, letting his underclassman get a good grip on the situation (and the ground). Souma nods wordlessly, and Kaoru takes that as his cue to start moving. Slowly at first, he draws his length out, and pushes back in, trying not to hurt the younger boy. Kanata watches with a smile as Kaoru begins to speed up, Souma whining and moaning and pressing his hips back. He really does look pretty in a dress like that, his hair spilling over his shoulders like an indigo waterfall.

Souma’s hands suddenly press against Kanata’s hips, shakily undoing his belt.

“Souma-kun?”

“I’m..gonna...be too loud…” his words are shaky, and accentuated with small gasps. Kanata doesn’t reject the offer...he’s always found the underclassman pretty too, and this is something nice, so he can’t turn it down. He hears Kaoru mumble a ‘don’t force yourself, Souma’, and the other two briefly wonder if maybe Kaoru’s jealous. If he is, it’s good for them-because Souma suddenly cries out as a result of a powerful thrust and the promptly muffles himself with Kanata’s cock.

Kanata coughs quietly, a bit unsure of how to react when Souma’s mouth is warm and wet around him. He balances himself on his knees, hands going to mess with his hair like Kaoru’s did earlier. Said blonde leans over, biting the back of Souma’s neck. The purple haired boy moans at the multitude of things he’s feeling, the sound and vibration jolting Kanata to wordlessly tighten his grip in Souma’s hair.

The undeniable sounds of sex fill the air, and Souma can only hope that Kanata closed the door behind him-it wouldn’t be a huge surprise if he didn’t but then again, he was probably not expecting to walk in on this. Souma cries out again when Kaoru hits the spot in him that makes him see stars, the rushes of pleasure coming faster and more intense as each thrust continues to pound that spot with an unfair accuracy.

On the other end, Kanata keeps himself characteristically quiet, the occasional small, yet pleased murmur of Souma’s name slipping from his lips. Souma revels in the praise he’s getting, the hands in his hair, on his hips, egging him on further as he unconsciously clenches down, seeing stars. It’s all he can do to not outright scream which would probably only be muffled so much, even with Kanata in his mouth. He know’s that the dress is probably going to get ruined, but that might be alright...no it’s not, he just doesn’t care.

He’s dripping on his stomach when Kanata leans over, in some impossible position, to carefully grab his aching member. It only takes a couple strokes for Souma to hit his climax, or more accurately, for it to hit him. Hit him it does, like a fucking freight train, until he’s clenched impossible tight around Kaoru, crying out helplessly around Kanata’s member, which is a lot further in his mouth than originally planned, spilling all over the blue-haired boy’s hand and probably staining his jacket.

Almost immediately after, Kaoru follows him, the increase in the tightness too much for him to bear. Crying out Souma’s name, Souma is barely aware of Kaoru’s end until he feels a slightly uncomfortable, sticky warmth within him that is definitely going to be a pain in the ass (no pun intended) to clean up.

Not long after, Kanata follows the other two, brought to his climax by Souma’s mouth. A soft, pleased ‘Souma-kun’ leaves his mouth as his hand pull in Souma’s hair, painfully so. Souma finally pulls away, exhausted, and sore. The three marine biology club members look around at each other, a sudden deafening silence in the room. Not that it lasts.

“Oh my goooooooood.” Kaoru falls onto his back dramatically, leaving Kanata to smile down at him, and Souma to frown slightly. Is Kaoru really going to complain? Souma will show him!

Outside the room, a girl with pink pigtails and vibrant eyes smiles. She’s pretty sure that she and Mayuri-nyan won’t be hearing too many more complaints from Souma-nyan about this mysterious ‘Kaoru’.

**Author's Note:**

> again, happy birthday friendo! to anyone else who read, i hope it was...decent? i don't even know what i'm doing with my life anymore. besides trying to learn how to write p0rn hoo boi. enstars is suffering.


End file.
